How many of you have looked yourself in the mirror lately or EVER for that matter...to see much deeper than just the outer characteristics of the color of your hair, the shape of your eyes, the skin tone of your face or what your smile says about you? Can you look deep within at the real person staring back at you in the mirror? What do you see? Are you pleased or are you disappointed at who is staring back at you? If you don't like what you see, only you can change this. When you feel depressed, confused or hurt, don't worry! Stand in front of a mirror, you will find the best one to solve your problem! TRUST YOURSELF ~ Anonymous.
The first step in my "Paint Your Life with New Colors" Program is self-evaluation. Self-evaluation forces each of us to look deep within ourselves, well beyond our outer beauty. Whether we like what we see or not, only we can change, in order to seek a better life for ourselves. For those of you young enough to remember Carol Burnett from the 60's and 70's, you will appreciate this quote from her: "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me."
First and foremost, your life will never change if you refuse or deny that it has to start with you. If you are leading a life style where you point fingers at everyone around you for what's not right in your life or everything that is wrong with your life today is blamed on others, then this old, learned behavior must stop...starting now, today. It is so important that you realize it truly starts with how you see yourself, through loving eyes or through hateful eyes. If you see yourself through hateful eyes, then you will see the rest of the world, the world around you and those in your circle through hateful eyes as well. This is what I am going to help you change.
Each week of my blog I will concentrate on the three main components of "Paint Your Life with New Colors". This week is self-evaluation. First and foremost, you need to be brutally honest with yourself starting right now. This exercise, this life change, is only between YOU and yes, YOU! No one around you should have say in who you are, your internal gifts and or the internal strength you possess...only you know this information.
You need to accept the things you cannot change about yourself and embrace them as unique gifts, the beauty that makes up who you are, rather than digging a hole for yourself. As they say, if you're in a hole, stop digging. So stop tearing yourself down, stop condemning yourself, stop focusing on what you don't have, but focus on what you do have. Stop comparing yourself to others, as you are uniquely designed and no two people were intentionally designed to be alike. Try this, on a piece of paper make a list of your gifts, talents, and capabilities. Post this list by your favorite mirror, and each morning when you look yourself in the mirror read aloud the list you created. With daily practice, soon the old messages in your head will dissolve and new messages will now become your reality and become your new belief system.
Remember, all of the old and ugly messages that others have instilled in our minds, and that we hold onto because it's all we know, have held us hostage for many years, but these false beliefs need to go away. The only way they will disappear once and for all is through this mirror exercise (daily practice) and the list of gifts, along with another exercise I will share in this blog. As Dr. Wayne Dyer says: "I answer to myself and no one else. The person looking back at you in the mirror is the one you have to answer to every day."
Seek to find your internal strengths. You have more power within than you believe. You must not rely on the outer world, the people of this world to give you this strength. Dig deep within and you will become aware of these internal strengths, the courage and determination. Courage and perseverance is already inbedded in you...we all have it, you just haven't tapped into yet. It is your internal gifts that will help you change old reruns of false ideals, failures, shame, guilt that others have instilled in you over the years. Others have convinced you for too long of who you are, what you should be doing with your life, and what your capabilities are...stop listening to others and start listening to the quiet whispers coming from your heart...this is your true unique design, who you are, your purpose, your passions and your dreams for your life.
Here's another exercise you should try. On a piece of paper make two columns. The left column should be titled "Self-Likes" and the right column should be titled "Self-Dislikes". In private, your alone time, complete both columns. Exhaust each column until you cannot think of anything else to jot down. Once you've completed both columns, sit down with a significant person in your life, partner, friend, relative, neighbor, pastor, etc. Share both lists with them...this exercise is going to be your "sanity/reality check list". You will soon discover in this conversation that the right column is not reality, it is only how others have judged you, condemned you in the past several years. You only think this is who you are (how you see yourself) because others have instilled false beliefs (right column) in your mind.
These exercises will be a true pivotal turn in your life. Trust me...I have spent the last 48 years of my life allowing others to destroy the true me. I use to allow others to dictate who I am, how I feel about myself, what career I should pursue, how much I should earn annually, how I should raise my children, my status in the community, who I am as a person, etc...no more. I took my life back long ago, so I know these exercises work because I have for the past 48 years time tested and proven these strategies. You are a uniquely designed person, with your own blue print. You have so much to share with the rest of the world, but old messages are holding you back. Your true self will evolve and old beliefs systems will dissolve forever. Your power within is greater than you realize!
So "Paint Your Life with New Colors" by starting with self-evaluation. Next week I will move onto the second paint brush - Perseverance. Feel free to post a comment on my blog or if you need a buddy, email me. Have a super week taking the first step in re-discovering the real YOU!
